Joygasm!

For our amusement and in honour of going away from Satan for the rest of my life, I've decided to compile antoher top ten list (a la "Satan Sleeps Below Me".. check that post if you want another laugh) of reasons why you must always know your rommate or be prepared for the worst case scenario.

Your rommate might be Satan:
10). If, to understand your roommate, you must use The Blacktionary and improvise from there to the "Ghettofied" version of that.
9). If you must listen to mindless praddle which contains the words/phrases "Honkey" and "She's really beautiful for a white woman"
8). If you have to hide your food in the BATHROOM in order for it to be around the next time you're hungry.
7). If you feel the bed below you rocking at least five of the seven days of the week.
6). If you hear the words "Like-ded, Work-ded," or "GUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUURL! YOU KNOW" at least once each conversation
5). If you find your away message turned off, porn links popped up -because she doesn't know how to close them- and your entire computer's screen in disarray.
4). If you get an explaination about Lent...that it's all right to cheat every now and again. Even better, add two points if you hear that your roommate's Cathloic church lets Methodists take communion.
3). If there are undistinguishable floods of men coming to and fro from the bottom bunk... nameless, penniless for feeing Satan, and stinky from the 3 minutes of actual thrusing that they've done.
2). If your roommate asks you .. and I quote "What's a bird?"

And the number one way to tell if Satan sleeps in your room?

1). If she insists on yelling out the five story window to ask you if you're going to be home tonight, when you're already downstairs in the parking lot half-way into the car.....addendum... if her voice is more and it is possible.. annoying than Fran Drescher's.