I Do Not Have an Accent!

Apparently there are some of you that think that I have an accent. By comparison I know that I have neither a Southern, Bostonian, Cheesehead/Fargo or New York accent... Which is not to say that I don't have one at all, but I will tell you without any hesitation, that as far as Michigan accents go, mine is minimal at worst. There are far worse things, certainly. Not only that, but my supposed Michigander accent is not at all as bad as a Yooper accent. More on that later.



I've been thinking about this for a little while now and yes, I have noticed that I say certain things a little differently. At least, differently than the native west-coasters. I sometimes catch myself saying cattywompus or screehawed, or referring to pasties not as the things that the strippers wear, but as the meat pie pastries that are yum-tastic, using "yah" (aka: "ja") instead of yeah, saying things like "in a coon's age" or "If, dog, rabbit" and generally confusing the crap out of people who aren't familiar with the terms. "Pop" has become "soda" and I've adopted the habits of my new climate rather well, using "gnarly" in both good and bad contexts and saying "dude" more than any one person ever should.

I say here that those things do not an accent make. Those happen to be a certain way of speaking that is not an accent but a dialect. I own up to my midwestern dialect and after consulting the wikipedia pages for both "yooper" and "pennsylvania dutch" dialects, I can absolutely see where I get my proclivities (check those websites by the way... hilarious!).

I'm going to go on a little rant here about Yooper talk.. mostly because I saw a bumper sticker the other day that I haven't seen in years and always makes me giggle. It says "Say yah to da UP, eh?" For those of you who aren't aware... that totally makes sense to people who know anyone who has lived in the UP (or of course has been there themselves).

Per the wikipedia page, Yooper speak extends over into Wisconsin and covers basically only that area and the Upper Peninsula (The U.P... thus, Yooper) of Michigan. While true, some of this slang leaks down to we trolls (those who live under the bridge, ie: the mitten part of Michigan) and we use some of it too. Now. Being that most of my family has lived/worked in the UP at some point in their lives, it's not surprising that I picked up on some of the habits of speech.

The UP is truly its own little world and while I'm not exactly qualified to share with you all the differences in culture, I will refer you to a useful website. This will at least partially explain why I speak the way I do... you all can laugh if you like and think it's cute but the point is,... it's not my fault.

Heh.. thanks Kobold.

Kobold sent me this comic this morning and while I had seen it before, I had forgotten all about it. It's from the wonderful people at Queen of Wands. I believe she's not making comics anymore (sad panda) but if you've got a minute to read through them... well, honestly, you'll start getting creeped out a little bit. The main character, Kestrel reminds me of a certain redhead that lives in a house with Kobold. Scary scary.

Either way, I thought I'd share the comic because, well, it's hilarious first of all and secondly, you would not BELIEVE how many times I've had to do this. I understand that generally speaking nerds/geeks are male and know their stuff. I want to know, though... how hard is it to believe that females can also be nerds and know their stuff.

Kobold said that if I actually had to talk like this, then he would call in just to hear it. The sad part is, I do actually have to talk like this to some of the men that call in (and sadder, some of the women). They want a GUY on the phone.

Roger has added, too, that in his experience, even if he has less of an idea what's going on, he gets the same thing. Or rather, his supervisor gets the same thing. She's basically a guru but the idiot callers want a man on the phone.

I can think of very few things that urk me more than being truly sexist and this is one of those things. Of course I like doors being opened for me. Of course I like being treated like a girl. I absolutely abhor being treated less than equal and I cannot stand the thought that someone thinks that because I have boobs, I am absolutely unable to help them when it comes to tecchy stuff. Those people can all die in a fiery plane crash.

Conclusion: I can do anything you can do better, I can do anything better than you. :P

Measurable Results!

A few things are going on in this post, but mostly I'll be bragging. If you don't like it, deal. I don't brag often and I only look for a pat on the head every now and then when I've done something especially spectacular. This weekend is one of those cases.

First and foremost, I should explain a few things so that this whole post makes a lot more sense to those of you who don't interact with me on a regular basis. 1). All of the boys and myself (and a great many more of my friends in town) are part of a Renaissance reinactment group 2). I'm not generally a crafty sort of person 3). I have major spatial issues which makes it difficult for me to do puzzles, etc. 4). I THRIVE on praise.

Moving on.

This weekend we had an event. For future note, any time I mention an event, it's most likely that I'm referring to #1 above. So there was an event this weekend and because I was super-stoked about finally getting the shipment from ringlord.com (chain mail website, yes it's super nerdy), I decided to bring my pretties to finish up a belly dancing belt that I had kinda-sorta started that Friday.

Let's note here that I'm new to this whole mail thing and I don't do very well usually. It takes me a long time because of #3 above and my hand strength isn't exactly what it should be. That being said, I had to undo 90% of what I had done because I wanted it to look differently. Major PITA. No good, but it killed time and we were having fun at the event. I DID get 75% of what I wanted DONE at the event, including adding bells and scales and making the belt retardedly heavy for no apparent reason. It is teh bomb and I'm super stoked to get a clasp for it and try it out at imperial war, where my dancing is being demanded by the girl-with-no-bones bellydancer.

See #4 above both for the girl-with-no-bones bellydancer saying I'm good enough to dance with her and Mr. Kobold's commentary about how he's proud of me for doing good mail! I was all concerned because when he first started to teach me, we were using craptastic wire and I got all sad and dispondant about it because the stuff I managed to make fell apart pretty quickly. Turns out, when I have the right materials, I have pretty decent skill for a beginner!

Also, I'm being offered cash-money to make belts for others. Holy crap, yeah I can do that without any issues at all. It's fun, it gives me something to do when I'm bored and more importantly, I get to give people prezzies. What's better than that?

Secondly, Mr. Puck is a knight (as are all the other boys) and has been without a squire for a few years. Apparently in this sort of symbiotic relationship that we already have, taking me on as a squire is not such a huge leap from what we've got going on anyway. The conversation went something like this.

"You're not a squire yet, are you?"

Nope.

" - something about being his squire-"

How would it be different than what I do now?

"... you'd have a red belt that I could pull on?"

Ok, why not?

So now I'm unofficially Mr. Puck's squire. It's funny primarily because I'm Josh's replacement, as he used to hold that position. So at the event when we heard Mr. Puck yell "Squire!" both of us turned. I had the good sense to go bounding over there. Apparently his Mt. Dew had been stolen by a certain gentleman. Now, being that Mr. Puck values Mt. Dew right up there with platinum and sex, this is a serious offense. Given that it's "effort" to go get the Dew for himself, he called me. Makes sense. So I bound over to the gentleman in question, slap him on the arm and put out my hand for the Dew, scolding him "No!" Mr. Puck proceeded to dissolve into a laughing fit.

I figure it this way: Mr. Puck has little-to-no fear of being silly, making an ass of himself and challenging people. If I'm his squire, I should behave much the same way. It's a challenge for me to do so, mostly because my tactics are usually... eh.. more tactful than a slap and a scolding. But I can blame it on my knight! This is what he would have done if he hadn't been too lazy to get out of his chair. Well, maybe. He probably would have ended up wrestling on the ground but I was in a bodice and that just ends badly for everyone after a while.

Later, Mr. Puck said he was proud of me. See #4 above. **glow~!**

Lastly, I've lost close to 20 lbs since I've moved down here to Vegas and I'm starting to actually like the way I look. (I know, shocking!) So I'm going to step it up a notch and join the gym. I checked out LV Athletic Club on Friday with Kobold and I've researched 24 hour fitness on my own. I figure the lesser of two evils is the LVAC, being that it's closer to the house. Even though the salesman with braces and TOO much energy was super excited about selling me a package and called me on SUNDAY (super big no no for me, thanks), I think I'm going to go with them. All in all, it's not a bad plan. $5 to sign up plus the first month's fee of $22. No biggie there except I'm in a long term contract with them... but as Dan put it, I don't plan on going anywhere so what's the big deal?

Conclusion: I'm crafty-ish enough to be asked to make things for others, I can slap people and get praised for it and I'm going to stop being so much of a fatty.